Making the Most of One-on-One Meetings: Strategies for Success

While one-on-one meetings can sometimes evoke feelings of anxiety, dread, or even annoyance—especially when they seem to take time away from our busy schedules—I think you’ll find that approaching them with intentionality and clear expectations can unlock their true potential. When done well, these meetings are powerful tools for fostering growth, aligning goals, and building stronger relationships.

Here are some key insights on preparing for 1x1s and maximizing their value.

The Importance of Employee Ownership

First and foremost, 1x1 meetings should be driven by the employee. The person being coached or mentored should come prepared with an agenda—topics they’ve thought about beforehand. While this might seem like an extra step, taking some time to prepare ensures that the meeting isn’t just a status update but a meaningful conversation. It also encourages employees to look forward to these discussions as opportunities for guidance on challenging projects or decisions.

FOR EMPLOYEES

Embrace the Opportunity

Use your 1x1s as a chance to seek guidance and develop your skills. Don’t worry so much about impressing your manager in these sessions—focus on identifying areas where you’re stuck or need growth. Asking for help is a sign of strength and shows your commitment to both personal and organizational success. Be transparent about your career aspirations and challenges. Remember, nothing is static—opportunities often come unexpectedly. Keeping your manager informed can open doors and align your development with the organization’s needs.

Prioritize Topics: The Eisenhower Matrix

To effectively decide what to discuss, I recommend using the Eisenhower or Time Management Matrix. The quadrant that consistently demands attention is Important but Not Urgent. These are critical issues that often get sidelined because urgent tasks demand immediate attention. 1x1 meetings provide a dedicated forum to discuss these important topics—items that could impact long-term success but tend to get lost in the daily shuffle. This also means

Build Your Agenda Through the Week

One of the things I’ve experienced both personally and with direct reports is last minute agenda creation. When we make our agendas right before the meeting, it will usually consist of all the urgent things of the moment, and not include the Important but Not Urgent items that get pushed out by today's concerns. Instead, I suggest building the agenda through the week, as these more important, deeper issues come up. Keep a running list of decisions to be made, problems to be discussed, or ideas to explore, and add them to your agenda. By the time your 1x1 approaches, you'll have a thoughtful agenda, leading to more productive discussions and better insights.

Focus on Problem-Solving

When raising issues, come prepared with your perspective. Offer your thoughts on possible solutions, along with the pros and cons of each. This approach helps your manager understand your thinking process and can lead to more constructive feedback. Avoid the temptation to seek quick fixes through texts or emails for complex problems—an open dialogue during your 1x1 can be much more effective.

FOR MANAGERS 

Cultivate a Supportive Environment

Effective 1x1s aren't just about work—they're about building trust and connection. Creating a safe, welcoming space is essential, and it is your responsibility as the manager to set the tone. Break down the boss dynamic and work to make a personal connection. Share a bit about yourself and get to know your direct reports' interests outside of work to help them know that you care about them personally. You'll almost always find some common interests, and this will help you make a closer connection. Remember Theodore Roosevelt's famous quote, "People don't care about how much you know until they know how much you care".

Prepare and Listen

As a manager, review your team member’s agenda beforehand. Familiarize yourself with their topics and be ready to share relevant updates or insights from higher-level discussions that impact their work. This helps employees see the bigger picture and understand how their efforts contribute to broader organizational goals. Secondly, and most importantly, listen. The direct report should be doing most of the talking during the 1x1, and managers should be doing most of the listening. This means allowing your direct reports to work through issues and resisting the urge to jump in too quickly to give instructions or advice. If your direct reports asks you, "what should I do?", first ask them to give their opinion with a "what do you think?" response. This will not only help them practice problem solving, but they'll have more ownership in the solution.

Avoid Status Update Overload

It's common for managers to want to use this time to get updates managers project statuses, but don't overdo it. This can eat into valuable developmental time. Instead, use project management tools or even just a shared lists file for routine updates like “on schedule” or “within budget.” Focus your 1x1 time on deeper issues—overcoming obstacles or exploring opportunities.

BUILD A PARTNERSHIP

Both parties play a role in making 1x1s productive. Managers should foster a trusting environment, offer constructive feedback, and guide employees toward leadership. Employees should come prepared, be honest about obstacles, and view their manager as a mentor.

When both sides approach these meetings with openness and intent, they become invaluable spaces for growth, problem-solving, and alignment—setting the stage for long-term success.

In Summary...

• Employees: Ask for help, prepare agendas throughout the week, share your reasoning, and be open about challenges and ambitions.

• Managers: Make a human connection with your direct reports, review agendas in advance, share relevant updates, and focus on listening.

• For Both: Use the time intentionally to address important issues, develop solutions, and build a stronger, more collaborative relationship.